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Contents
- A perfectly normal greeting — and suddenly a scene...
- The clear answer: Yes, donkeys have feelings
- Are donkeys really jealous?
- Why are donkeys so emotionally complex?
- Other emotions donkeys can show
- How intelligent are donkeys really?
- The deep bond: How donkeys make friends
- What this means for donkey owners
- Why this is important to us at DON DONKEY'S®
- Frequently asked questions about the emotions and behavior of...
- Conclusion: Donkeys are personalities
Do donkeys have feelings? Can they be jealous, feel joy, or grieve? Many people ask themselves this question when spending time with donkeys for the first time. What animal behaviorists, animal owners, and scientific studies know about this surprises even experienced animal lovers. In this post, we explore the complex emotional life of these intelligent animals — with a real-life example from a German donkey farm.
A perfectly normal greeting — and suddenly a scene like something out of a relationship drama
Recently, we visited a donkey farm in Germany. We greeted one of the donkeys and gave it a quick scratch on the neck — a perfectly normal interaction.
And then she came. Another donkey. You could tell by her coat that she had just been rolling around in the straw. Her entire back was covered in straw.
And what does she do? She simply pushes herself between us and the other donkey. Quite obviously. Almost demonstratively. As if she wanted to say: "Not with him. With me!"
What we saw there was unmistakable: jealousy. Not learned. Not trained. But a real, spontaneous emotion.
And that raises a question many people ask: Do donkeys really have feelings like we do?
The clear answer: Yes, donkeys have feelings
Modern behavioral research agrees on one point: donkeys are among the most emotionally intelligent livestock animals we know. They can show a wide range of emotions — from joy and affection to jealousy, grief, and even resentment.
This may surprise some. Because donkeys are often mocked as "stubborn" or "stupid" in our culture. Both are scientifically incorrect — and contradict everything that people who really spend time with these animals report.
Are donkeys really jealous?
The answer is clear: Yes. Jealous behavior in donkeys is well documented — both in scientific observational studies and in countless everyday reports from owners.
Typical signs of jealousy in donkeys:
- Pushing between: If a donkey notices that another is getting attention, it physically places itself between the two. Exactly what we experienced during our visit.
- Gently pushing away: The jealous donkey pushes the other aside with its head or body — often without aggression, but clearly.
- Demanding attention: They nudge the person with their nose, rest their head on the shoulder, or position themselves directly in front of the person.
- Ear play: The ears go slightly back — not pinned back as in aggression, but rather "grumpy".
- Watching from a distance: Some donkeys pull back, but keep a close eye on the situation.
Interesting: Jealousy in donkeys can be directed at other donkeys as well as people. Anyone who regularly visits several donkeys knows the feeling: You greet a certain donkey first — and the others clearly show that they noticed.
Why are donkeys so emotionally complex?
To understand this, you have to know how donkeys live in nature. Unlike horses, which move in large open herds, wild donkeys in their native region (North Africa, Western Asia) are organized in small, stable social groups. They form close, often lifelong bonds with certain companions.
These bonds are so deep that donkeys can even become physically ill when separated from their closest partner. Behavioral researchers speak of real grief here — a phenomenon that is also well documented in elephants and some primates.
Because donkeys form such intense relationships, they also need emotional tools — the subtle signals of affection, trust, rejection, jealousy, and conflict. Without these emotions, they could not maintain their complex social systems at all.
Other emotions donkeys can show
In addition to jealousy, the emotional repertoire of donkeys is surprisingly broad. What owners regularly observe:
Joy
Donkeys show joy by bucking in the pasture, running exuberantly, playful biting (with each other), tail wagging, and a typical "happy" ear position. Some donkeys even "laugh" by pulling up their upper lip (the so-called flehmen response).
Affection and trust
If a donkey offers you its neck or back to scratch, it is an enormous proof of trust. These body parts are normally well protected in herd animals. A donkey that lets you do that says: "I trust you completely."
Grief
The loss of a close partner can lead to weeks of apathy, loss of appetite, and withdrawal behavior in donkeys. Experienced owners report donkeys that were never the same after the death of their partner.
Curiosity
Donkeys are extremely curious animals. They carefully examine new objects, people, and situations — with their nose, teeth, and eyes. This curiosity is an expression of their high intelligence.
Resentment
An often underestimated feeling in donkeys: They can remember for a long time who once treated them unfairly. There are numerous reports of donkeys that still avoid a certain person after years.
Empathy
Donkeys show clear empathy towards other animals and people. An example: If a donkey is sick in the barn, its closest herd companions often stay right next to it — as if to say: "I'll stay with you."
How intelligent are donkeys really?
A widespread cliché: donkeys are stubborn or stupid. Both have been scientifically disproven.
Studies and observations show: donkeys are highly intelligent and in many cognitive areas even more capable than horses. They can:
- Remember faces for years — both of people and companions
- Distinguish between different voices and reliably recognize their names
- Perform simple problem-solving (opening doors, manipulating latches)
- Feel the emotional states of their people (nervous, calm, anxious)
- Remember routes and paths for a long time, often better than horses
The supposed "stubbornness" of donkeys is actually a sign of their intelligence: They make their own decisions and do not let themselves be forced into things that seem uncertain or dangerous to them. Where a horse often obeys blindly, a donkey thinks first.
The deep bond: How donkeys make friends
A special chapter in the social behavior of donkeys is their friendships. When two donkeys form a close bond, it is often for their whole lives. They eat together, rest together, roll around in the dust together.
We have experienced this ourselves on the farm: Two donkeys that practically can no longer be separated from each other. The owner calls it "they found each other". If one goes somewhere, the other goes along. If one rests, the other rests.
These bonds are so important that they must always be taken into account in good donkey care. A single donkey without a partner is an unhappy donkey — that is one of the most important principles of donkey care.
What this means for donkey owners
If you keep donkeys — or are considering which ones to keep — these are the most important insights from the knowledge of their emotional life:
1. Never keep a single donkey
Donkeys need at least one companion. A donkey with a horse or a goat is better than no company at all — but never as good as another donkey.
2. Respect bonds
If two donkeys have a close friendship, they must never be separated — unless it is absolutely unavoidable (e.g., due to illness). Even when selling, "friend pairs" should always be sold together.
3. Invest time
Donkeys build trust slowly, but once it is there, it is forever. Those who take their time will be rewarded with incredibly deep relationships.
4. Learn to read emotions
Ears, eyes, body posture, breathing — donkeys communicate a lot if you look closely. An attentive owner can tell in the morning how a donkey is doing.
5. Individualize care
No donkey is like another. Some need a lot of attention, others prefer peace. Some are brave, others anxious. Those who accept this individuality can truly do justice to donkeys.
Why this is important to us at DON DONKEY'S®
At DON DONKEY'S®, we distribute donkey milk from European partner farms, where the donkeys live in herds and are milked by hand. A donkey only gives milk when she has a foal, and the foal drinks first. It is milked by hand and in small quantities. Why this makes the milk so rare, you can read in our post Why Donkey Milk Is So Rare.
When selecting our farms, we therefore look not only at the price and milk quantity, but also at how the people there treat the donkeys: whether they know the individual personalities of the animals, whether friend pairs stay together, and whether they pay attention when an animal becomes quiet or withdraws.
That is why we also regularly visit German donkey farms, even though we do not source milk from them. We want to experience the animals in different forms of care to better assess what makes good care. At one of these farms, we have taken on a sponsorship — for donkeys with a difficult past.
Frequently asked questions about the emotions and behavior of donkeys
Can donkeys become jealous?
Yes. Jealous behavior in donkeys is well documented. They push themselves between people and another donkey, demand attention, or clearly show that they do not like a situation. This emotion is authentic and occurs both towards companions and towards people.
Are donkeys more intelligent than horses?
In many cognitive areas, yes. Donkeys can remember faces, voices, and routes for a long time — sometimes better than horses. They make independent decisions, which is often misinterpreted as "stubbornness", but is actually a sign of their high intelligence.
Can donkeys grieve?
Yes, and very deeply. The loss of a close partner can lead to weeks or months of apathy in donkeys. They eat less, withdraw, and sometimes also become physically ill. That is why donkey friend pairs should never be separated.
How can I tell if a donkey likes me?
If a donkey voluntarily lets you scratch its neck, back, or belly, it is an enormous proof of trust. These body parts are sensitive for herd animals. Further signs: It comes to you on its own, follows you with its ears, breathes calmly in your vicinity.
How many donkeys should you keep at least?
At least two. Donkeys are herd animals and need companions — not horses or goats as replacements. A single donkey is an unhappy donkey. Anyone who can only keep one donkey should better postpone the purchase.
Can donkeys remember who treated them badly?
Yes, and for years. Donkeys have an excellent memory for people. They recognize people by voice, smell, and appearance and keep experiences with them in their memory for a long time. Anyone who has once hurt or frightened a donkey will not be able to make amends that quickly.
Are donkeys good family animals?
With proper care, yes. Donkeys are calm, patient, and live long (30-40 years are normal). What is important: Enough space, appropriate feeding (no bread, little sugar!), always at least two donkeys together, and enough time for activity and observation.
Conclusion: Donkeys are personalities
Anyone who really gets to know donkeys thinks differently about these animals. They are not the stupid pack animals of the cliché — but intelligent, empathetic, emotional beings with their own characters.
They can be jealous, feel joy, grieve, fall in love, get bored, and laugh. They have friends and sometimes also "enemies". They remember faces and situations. And they give you back what you give them — many times over.
The next time you meet a donkey: Take your time. Observe it. Look it in the eyes. You will be surprised how much personality looks back at you.
At DON DONKEY'S®, we distribute donkey milk from European farms, where the donkeys live in herds and are milked by hand. More about our approach to partner farms can be found on our page How we work with our partner farms.
Would you like to see more from everyday life with donkeys? We regularly share short insights from our visits to German donkey farms. Follow us for this on Instagram.
